There are all kinds of disappointments when you work in real estate.  I’m convinced that the only way to be successful in this sort of business is to be able to develop the ability to pick yourself up from real estate disappointments quickly.  I’ve written about bad days in real estate in the past.  Remember real estate and the rake?  There are plenty of others, Some real estate agents are jerks, survey blues, and having to give your clients bad news are just a few of the posts I’ve written that relate to bad days in real estate.  I wanted to take an article from the web and posit my thoughts as they relate to real estate, but I didn’t find what I was looking for.  Rather than steps to pick yourself up from a real estate disappointment, I thought I’d offer points to consider and actions to take.  I suspect we don’t often see these lists online because they don’t have snappy click titles.  Let’s face it, 7 steps of overcome a disappointment is a lot better than points and actions to take when dealing with a disappointment.

Dealing With Real Estate Disappointment

  1. Define the Disappointment. I think a lot of the time people have trouble figuring out what the actual disappointment is.  For example, let’s take a home buyer.  When they put an offer in on a home and it is rejected, they feel many different feelings of disappointment.  This has a way of taking things out of control.  If you want to buy a house, and your offer is rejected, the disappointment is that you didn’t get a home.  It’s defined.  Don’t let things spiral into thoughts like, I didn’t get this house, because I didn’t have a good job, and I didn’t pass the running test in 7th grade, and the last movie I went to was a sequel and it was bad.  Define the disappointment only.


  1. Consider an alternative ending. On the rare times I go to list a home for sale and the seller decides to go in another direction, it’s quite a disappointment.  Sometimes it helps to consider what an alternative ending would have looked like.  For example, I could have gotten the listing.  I also could have gotten the listing and the home seller was a miserable human being who would have sucked the life out of me.  We know the ending we got, and that was disappointing, but we don’t know how it would have worked out if we’d actually gotten the alternate ending.


  1. Put your disappointment into perspective. Let’s say that your cousin didn’t ask you to be a buyer’s agent for them.  We know that hyper possessive real estate agents do themselves no favors, but it is still quite a disappointment when a family member doesn’t list with you.  Put this into perspective though.  If you had your best month ever in real estate, why are you giving so much weight to your cousin?  Let’s be honest, you didn’t really like him, and it’s probably better he went with someone else.


  1. Do something that advances your day. If you are still lying in bed at 10, get up.  If you are awake, eat breakfast. If you’ve eaten breakfast, take a shower.  Keep advancing your day. When I run into a disappointment, I tend to get stuck doing things that don’t advance my day.  For example, I’ll check Twitter, or search with web, or something like that.  It’s better to do something that moves the day forward.  Even the smallest little things can get you started again.


  1. Accept your disappointment. We all have bad days.  Accept that you are feeling disappointed about it.  Tell yourself, “hey, that didn’t go so great.”  There’s nothing wrong with acknowledging a failure or disappointment.  Things get really weird really fast when you are in denial.

A Word Of Caution

The things above are the things I do to get over disappointments.  I’m not a professional psychologist; I’m a real estate broker.  While these things may work for me, they also may not work for you.  If you are feeling down for days and days on end, that’s likely not a real estate disappointment.